Freedom to Parent 21^st Century Kids

Extremists are using the term “parents’ rights” to confuse us – the truth is they want to undermine public education and control how we all raise our kids.

All parents should be free to make their own parenting decisions. For example, if a parent doesn’t want their kid reading a certain book, they can make that decision. If a parent doesn’t want their kid to receive sex ed, they can opt them out of any lesson they want. But a loud minority wants to take that right away from other parents and ban books and lessons for all kids.

Mainstream parents don’t want to be told how to raise our children by a loud, vocal minority. Parenting is hard enough – we’re done letting extremists who want to ban books, censor school curriculums, and target families of transgender children with political attacks control the conversation. We want the freedom to raise our kids for the 21st century.

In March 2023, the Republican-led House in Congress passed a Parents’ Bill of Rights. But the bill largely covers rights that parents already have in public education. If you’re wondering why they would write a bill that doesn’t actually grant any new rights, you’re not alone. Bills that aren’t expected to pass are often called messaging bills. The Parents’ Bill of Rights was never even voted on in the Senate. Republicans only wanted to show their support for extremists driving the culture wars in our schools.

Attempted book bans and curriculum challenges have recently skyrocketed to historic levels. These challenges are an effort to whitewash U.S. history, erasing people of color and LGBTQ+ people from our nation’s history. Republican support for this movement has led us to where we are today, with the Trump administration dismantling the Department of Education and issuing executive orders to destroy public education.

With the Parents’ Bill of Rights, Republicans intended to show support for extremist groups like Moms for Liberty in their pursuit to ban books and prevent the teaching of accurate history in the classroom. These kinds of bills fuel the culture wars and distract from real issues facing our kids and teachers. It intimidates teachers, keeping them from teaching accurate history or offering diverse books on their classroom shelves. Students then lose access to important information in their classrooms, making them less prepared for the real world.

The Parents’ Bill of Rights is pushed by extremists on the right who want to remove stories about people of color and LGBTQ+ people from public libraries, classrooms, and history lessons. Moms for Liberty, which was labeled as an extremist group by the Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC), is among those promoting the Parents’ Bill of Rights. These are the same extremists that are pushing book bans. They’re just trying to hide behind the bill’s misleading name to continue attacking public education.

So far, the “parents’ rights” agenda in schools has included some truly terrifying things: tracking kids’ menstrual cycles, requiring genital inspections for kids to participate in school sports, suing teachers who wear “I’m here” badges in support of LGBTQ+ students, and banning books about Anne Frank, Ruby Bridges, Martin Luther King Jr., LGBTQ+ kids, climate change, and even books about book bans! None of these actually protect individual freedom. Instead, they’re about controlling what students and families believe, do, read, and learn. These bans and laws take away our rights and the rights of our kids.

The groups behind “parents’ rights” are a small but loud minority, with big outside funding. In many cases, the people yelling at school board meetings don’t even have kids in the school district. Even worse, they’ve become known for using harassment and intimidation to silence librarians, teachers, parents, students and community leaders. Moms for Liberty members have threatened people with gun violence, accused parents of child abuse and grooming, and even tried to have children removed from healthy family homes. They do not speak for us!

The chaos is causing real harm in our communities, and it’s getting expensive. The Costs of Conflict Report shows that these culture wars cost public schools $3.2 billion dollars in the 2023-2024 school year. Those are taxpayer dollars that could have gone to improving our public schools. But that’s really the point. The extremist minority causing this chaos has every intention of undermining our public schools, which eight in ten children in America rely on for their education.

The majority of us don’t want book bans, but extremist politicians and outside groups who want to undermine public education are attempting to ban books in every state, with increasing frequency. Groups such as Moms for Liberty are often used as the messengers at school board meetings and state legislative hearings to call for these bans. Despite the name, they are a well-funded national political organization and their actions aren’t pro-liberty at all – they want to limit the individual freedom of all families and they do not speak for mainstream moms.

In many situations, the actions of just one parent can result in dozens of books being banned. When someone requests a book ban, too often, it is removed from the shelves before it can even go through a review process. Meanwhile, the entire community is unable to access that information.

Learn how to take action in your community by downloading our Parent Playbook. And Join us at our next Banned Book Club event. Together, we can put an end to this nonsense.

Political groups such as Moms for Liberty try to confuse other parents by claiming they are targeting books with adult content, but the truth is that the books they try to ban are books about people who don’t look or live like them — and they’re disproportionately by people of color and LGBTQ+ authors. They ban children’ s books about penguins and classics like Toni Morrison and To Kill A Mockingbird. They’ve even tried to ban books about Rosa Parks, Anne Frank, Martin Luther King Jr, and Ruby Bridges!

Many of the books they target are not even assigned reading — they are simply available on public library shelves.

When books about different groups of people are banned, it harms ALL children. Kids miss out on learning about different religions, races, cultures, or necessary historical context for the world they live in today. It robs them of the opportunity to prepare for the complexities of a 21st century global economy.

When children see books about people like them and their families banned, it can make them feel like they don’t matter. A Trevor Project 2023 study found that students who had an affirming or supportive school environment reported a lower rate of attempted suicide.

To learn more about how book bans affect communities, check out our Book Ban Busters resources.

PEN America has a map of book bans by state through the 2024 school year.

First, we want to make sure it’s clear these books are being banned and challenged under false pretenses. Age-appropriate books are being pulled from shelves every day for misleading reasons with really harmful consequences. Not having access to these books prevents kids from better understanding themselves and the world around them. Taking away books also makes kids less prepared for the real world. ALL kids are harmed when we erase LGBTQ+ people from our schools and don’t teach accurate American history and comprehensive sex education.

School vouchers are a way for public, taxpayer funds to be given to families to use towards private school tuition, rather than send their kids to public schools. Vouchers divert much needed public funding — we’re talking billions of dollars — away from our public schools and into private schools, often with little to no expectation for the private schools to meet the same standards that the state expects from public schools.

Voucher programs have a long history in the U.S., notably in the 1950’s as a way for white families to keep their kids out of desegregated public schools. Now, extremists continue to use them as a way to undermine public education. They lie and say vouchers are a way for minority and low-income children to access other school options, but in actuality, it doesn’t work that way. Most voucher programs don’t provide enough funding to fully cover private school tuition and low-income families still can’t make up the difference. Also, many smaller, rural communities don’t have private schools as options anyway. Most of the time, it ends up being wealthy families who can already afford and are already attending private schools who benefit the most from vouchers. Meanwhile, since private schools don’t have to meet the same state and federal standards, they can turn away students at will, and often don’t accept students who have Individual Education Plans or special education needs.

Research and polling shows that voucher programs do not actually improve student success and the majority of us don’t support vouchers, but extreme politicians are creating and expanding these programs anyway. One of the first executive orders Donald Trump issued in his second term called for expanding school vouchers, and his budget bill approved by Congress creates the first ever school voucher program with federal funds. While they cite public school performance as a reason to expand voucher programs, they are often the same people who have underfunded public schools for years. It makes no sense to funnel even more money away from public schools if there are problems that need to be addressed. Taxpayer funds should be used to support the public schools that our communities need and deserve.

SEL stands for social and emotional learning. SEL programs teach self-awareness, self-management, empathy, relationship-building, and decision-making. These social, emotional skills are essential to prepare our kids for success in the 21st century. According to research, SEL helps kids manage stress, get along better with others, and improve academic performance.

But extremists are attacking SEL programs in schools as part of their larger attacks on public education. Some lawmakers have even introduced bills to ban SEL. That’s right: people are trying to ban teaching our kids empathy!

If you hear the term “CRT,” or Critical Race Theory, anywhere near anything about K-12, you can guarantee that you’ve been targeted by a disinformation campaign. Extremists are deliberately trying to mislead us by using the term “CRT” because they know it’s unfamiliar. Instead of admitting that they want to ban lessons about slavery or books by Black authors, they just say they don’t want “CRT.” The truth is that they don’t want our kids to learn anything about the history of race in America at all.

Fortunately, the majority of parents know that our kids need to learn accurate history–the good, the bad, and the ugly–so they can prepare for the future and reach their full potential.

You probably didn’t even start hearing about CRT until recently, when extremists started using it as a political tool (we hadn’t heard of it either), but it’s been around for more than 40 years. It’s a graduate level academic and legal concept that explains the history of systemic racism and how it impacts things like our education, housing, and financial systems today. Complex stuff, right? That’s why it’s taught in law school or graduate school…and not K-12.

Unfortunately, this disinformation campaign has been successful. As of June 2024, extremist politicians in 44 states have introduced bills or taken other steps that would restrict lessons on race. Just one more reason that it’s so important for mainstream parents to speak up.

DEI is an acronym for Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion. Far-right extremists are attacking the concept and want to end DEI programs for good. But when people understand what it truly is, the majority of Americans support DEI and say it’s a good thing.

Diversity refers to the differences among people like: race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, age, religion, physical ability, class, and more. Equity means treating everyone fairly and giving them equal opportunities. Inclusion means creating an environment where everyone feels welcome, safe, valued, and heard. So taken as a whole, DEI means any effort or program instituted to protect us from discrimination!

In schools, this could mean leadership development programs for minority students, or programs to help first-generation college applicants navigate their admissions process, or the availability of all-gender restrooms.

The goal of DEI programs is to make sure that everyone has equal access to opportunities and that they are treated fairly. It’s hard to understand why anyone would want to end that!

The truth is educators just want to teach kids what they need to be set up for success — yet extremists are obsessing over trans people who make up about .5% of the population, targeting these kids as a political strategy to try to confuse and scare us. Trans kids are no different from any other kid. They have the same hopes and dreams and deserve to be treated with dignity, to get an education without being bullied or harassed, the same as anyone else.

Extremists made up the phrase “gender ideology” because they know that trans and non-binary people are unfamiliar territory for many parents. The “parents’ rights” crowd actually doesn’t want schools to have books written by any LGBTQ+ authors or include any characters that don’t reinforce traditional gender stereotypes. They don’t want teachers to be able to provide support to kids who need it most. They don’t want to acknowledge that trans people exist at all.

Because of this fearmongering, states are passing bans on the already tiny number of trans athletes. For example, North Carolina passed a ban on trans athletes on girls’ and women’s sports teams…but there are only two trans girls playing high school sports in the entire state. There are now more laws banning trans kids from playing sports than there are trans kids playing sports.

The truth is, these laws open up ANY kid to being targeted. If any parent thinks a girl looks too tall or too strong, she could be subject to genital inspections before she can join the field hockey team. That’s just disgusting and can not be allowed to happen.

We don’t think any child should be subject to grownups insisting on checking their body parts. We don’t think any child should be subject to political attacks.

Trans kids don’t have an ideology or political agenda. They just want to be kids and be themselves. You can dig deeper into this with our Okay, But Why series where we answer the question, why are so many people talking about trans kids?

Comprehensive sex education teaches medically accurate, inclusive, and age-appropriate information about human sexuality, health, and relationships. It covers basic topics such as anatomy, puberty, contraception, gender, sexual orientation, consent, self-esteem and healthy relationships. The American Academy of Pediatrics supports comprehensive sex ed because it helps to keep kids and communities safe. It has been shown to help reduce rates of sexually transmitted infections, unintended pregnancies, bullying, and abuse. Sex ed is one of the most transparent curricula available in schools, with entire lessons available online and multiple ways for parents to opt their child out of any lesson they wish. Children are encouraged to discuss the information learned with parents so the family’s values are respected.

Some of our kids are struggling – and not getting the support they need. We see it, and we know you see it, too.

A Pew report found that more than three-quarters of parents are at least somewhat worried about their children’s mental health. A CDC survey found that 57% of high school girls reported experiencing “persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness in the past year” in 2021. Seven in ten of LGBTQ youth say that state legislation targeting them is taking a toll on their mental health.

Add to all of this the fear of gun violence in schools, and our kids are dealing with a lot. Studies show that students who experience a school shooting are more likely to have PTSD, depression, trouble focusing, and are less likely to graduate high school, college or graduate school. Over 370,000 students have experienced a school shooting in America. Even if a student does not attend a school where a shooting occurs, the frequency of mass shootings in our country means that children are hearing about mass violence weekly, and this also causes mental health issues. The lockdown drills, meant to prepare students for an active shooter situation, also cause increased stress, anxiety and depression. Some schools even report that students think the drill is real, and write goodbye notes to their parents.

Half of all mental health conditions start before the age of 14. But instead of providing better mental health support for our kids, “parents rights’” extremists are defunding suicide prevention programs and targeting mental health programs with political attacks. So at a time when our kids need more access to mental health care, these programs are being targeted.

Learn more about why kids are struggling with their mental health in our Okay But Why? series.

No, teachers are focused on teaching an accurate education. Most of you probably know some public school teachers in your life. You see them head into school before most of us start work, take piles of paper home each night to grade and dedicate time outside of the classroom to lesson planning. Today’s teachers are incredibly busy. They’re watching out for your kids each day, teaching kids 21st century skills, playing catch up on any lost learning from the pandemic, and continuing their ongoing education.

If any indoctrination is happening, it’s actually coming from those aligned with the “parents’ rights” crowd, like in Oklahoma, where the state superintendent has ordered all public schools to teach the Bible in fifth through twelfth grades.

We all know that there’s a shortage of teachers right now. 45% of public schools reported being understaffed at the start of the 2023-24 school year. Some school districts in rural areas of the south and west are even moving to a 4 day week schedule, with the teacher shortage leading this push.  On top of the COVID-19 pandemic, teachers have been dealing with harassment, book bans, and laws restricting what they are allowed to teach in the classroom.

One-quarter of teachers have revised their lesson plans and teaching practices to limit or exclude talking about race and gender. There is a chilling effect on teachers, when even the possibility of bans lead teachers to change their lessons and remove books from their classroom shelves. That means kids aren’t being given access to an accurate education because of the attacks on teachers.

Project 2025 is the plan that extremists have created for Donald Trump to implement in his second term, and it intends to end public education. He started implementing it immediately. So far, they have:

• Drastically cut staff and funding at the Department of Education and set a plan in motion to close it.
• Closed half of Head Start’s regional office and fired 60% of its staff.
• Tried to withhold almost $7 billion in public school funding that had already been approved by Congress.
• Created a federal school voucher program.
• Ended all federal guidance on fighting book bans and fired the person who investigated unlawful book removals, dismissing all complaints that were being investigated.
• Ordered the end of all Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion initiatives in public schools and threatened to withhold funding from any schools who don’t comply.
• Brought back his 1776 commission to dictate what schools should be allowed to teach nationwide.

The Republican National Platform also proposes the elimination of the Department of Education and prioritizes school voucher programs and homeschooling. It wants to let states determine how schools should be run, but also promotes the conservative curricula championed by Donald Trump’s 1776 Commission.

We know that Donald Trump is following both these plans to the detriment of our children and public schools nationwide. Learn more about how Project 2025 is being implemented here.

Elected leaders need to listen to mainstream moms. We know what issues are impacting our kids. We talk about these issues at the bus stop every day: gun safety so our kids aren’t anxious to go to school, increased funding for public education, supporting teachers instead of driving them to quit, ending book bans, creating safe environments free from bullying and discrimination, and mental health support for kids who are struggling.

Join us! Red Wine & Blue is a powerful grassroots community of almost half a million diverse suburban women. We launched “Freedom to Parent” because these attacks are a direct threat to our kids and our public schools. Someone needs to speak up for the majority! Sign up here to join the movement.

No kids? No problem! The “Freedom to Parent” movement is open to everyone whether or not you have children. We can all help make sure kids are supported, safe and have access to accurate public education. Today’s kids will be the leaders and teachers and caretakers of the future. It’s up to all of us to ensure they are given the knowledge and skills they need to be successful. Join us in this grassroots movement!